Top things not to say during sex

[ShadowFox88]

This is the third condom to break on me, first your sister, then the dog, and now you!
Well, I guess it's time I look for a second job to raise the children. Gonna have a hell of a time explaining why my nieces and nephews are siblings, and why some of them are hairy.

 

[CookieSampler]

"You're better than my [insert family member]!"

 

[Godhorse77]

Thanks for doing this

 

[CookieSampler]

You're gonna pay me, right?

 

[ShadowFox88]

Man post nut clarity is a bitch! I forgot the condom!

 

[NobodyHereButUsMice]

Don't worry. It'll clear up in a few days.

 

[StarbardRed9]

What? No, I didn't cum in you...but check behind your ear.

 

[TammCa]

yawnnnnnnnnnnnnn, are you finished yet ?

 

[StarbardRed9]

No, you can't remove the bag...that's currently the best part.

 

[elijadarkfur]

Are you in?

You beat me to it. lol!

 

[Godhorse77]

Go on Harry you're the chosen one
(In oney Ron's impressions)

 

[Minxen]

You beat me to it. lol!

Sadly I have actually said it on one occasion with poor boy with very small penis. He was such a great guy. So thats a shame. I was a typical teenager and didn't think before I spoke.

 

[MoreBeastThanMan]

I think we should break up

 

[Chiara2003]

Ur credit card jus got declined ?

 

[Minxen]

Actually the worst thing I ever said during sex, was the first time I had sex when I was 15 with my equally virginal male partner who had pretended to be all experienced about the whole thing. Lovely man. We remained friends and lovers for many decades later. But when he finished I said....

"Is that it? "

(I know a lot of women are going to relate to that)

He eventually forgave me.

 

[TammCa]

is it in yet ?

 

[Minxen]

I think we should break up

Well that would be the most stupid thing to say if you actually want to come.
Please tell me it wasn't said to you.
That would be cruel.

 

[Minxen]

is it in yet ?

Obviously a common theme....sigh.

 

[MoreBeastThanMan]

Well that would be the most stupid thing to say if you actually want to come.
Please tell me it wasn't said to you.
That would be cruel.

Thankfully not, nor said by me

 

[milf38k9]

I smell something strange, like armpit

 

[elijadarkfur]

Sadly I have actually said it on one occasion with poor boy with very small penis. He was such a great guy. So thats a shame. I was a typical teenager and didn't think before I spoke.

Uh oh... But hey, we've been all there in a way.

 

[Godhorse77]

I have a friend in rome, his name is biggus dickus

 

[AllKnottedUpIn210]

"Does this look infected to you?"

 

[TammCa]

oh yes, good boy, knott me, oh sorry my mistake you don't have a knott, lol

 

[blackstallion93]

Your a lot looser than I imagined

 

[sir]

Oh wait I thought I was fucking you .....

 

[Godhorse77]

(Put on doom helmet) rip and tear

 

[K9jack]

Hurry up, I still gotta do your mom too and footy is up in 25 mins

 

[StarbardRed9]

Not saying anying, just start doing your nails and sighing. Lol

 

[Chiara2003]

“Can we jus start over”…?