Top things not to say during sex

[Duramax96]

Me: oh Lilly you were sooo good!
Dog barks.
Lilly: thanks. You were good too.
Me: i was talking to your dog

 

[Reconscope]

Im sorry little one

 

[ZooDogLover320]

"Get the dog off the bed"

 

[Stoli]

Kay why? Because your genitals are dry!

 

[Duramax96]

Guy to woman: no you cant touch it, you already broke yours off!

 

[Duramax96]

Woman: oh babe, your tongue feels wonderful!
Me: that's my dog.

 

[Deleted member 76481]

Forgive me father for I am about to sin

 

[420Fatty]

Bro, after we fuck this chicken, Let's pluck it.

 

[Furf2b2b]

ARF ALL !! Honey ? I brought in MR.ED to Play Tooo !!!

 

[Pillar]

Obey me.

(This doesn't count if it's BDSM.)

 

[Duramax96]

I slept with your pony last night. We tossed around in the hay.

 

[Michioliphant]

Is that a pig sty or you I’m smelling?

 

[Duramax96]

Did you just fart.....? Oh, that's your breath... Never mind

 

[Duramax96]

HEY! Get your finger outta there!

 

[Michioliphant]

Never mind NO.
WHY?

 

[Michioliphant]

My god! Your name Sasquatch or something?

 

[FloofyNewfie]

Girl, your pussy is so oily, America wants to invade it!

 

[shadow5473]

Girl, your pussy is so oily, America wants to invade it!

You need to get out more buddy

 

[saddlebum66]

You’re not hard enough. I’m bored.

yes, darling, on your knees....no, darling, not to say your prayers....yet.

 

[Ruben]

What was the safeword again?

 

[PurpleGuy1]

Hey, you. You’re finally awake. You were trying to cross the border,
right? Walked right into that Imperial ambush, same as us, and that
thief over there.

 

[Furf2b2b]

Arf ? Look , Your Boy Friend is Begin A Bitch Again for MY male !!!

 

[oldgoat75]

you can never tell where this will end up,,,,,guess a whole

 

[Michioliphant]

My tongue stuck on your piercing baby, help?

 

[cooky28]

Is it in yet

 

[Michioliphant]

I can’t find it, are you sure you have one?

 

[oldgoat75]

That was quick.

 

[saddlebum66]

Fire in the Hole!

 

[Memprys]

That was great, Carrie! Er... Kathy! Caitlin? Margaret? Steve? Kamala?

 

[Furf2b2b]

You're DAD'S ass is Tighter Then Your Ass IS !