Top things not to say during sex

[Chiara2003]

Was that even 30 seconds?

 

[TammCa]

you could take lessons from your dog

 

[MrsShemon]

Shrink god damn it! The guest will be here soon.

 

[Chiara2003]

I looks at u an wanna jus says… “shut up!”

 

[TammCa]

how does the dogs cum taste ? giggle

 

[Chiara2003]

how does the dogs cum taste ? giggle

I thinks many here would like if says that?

 

[MrsShemon]

Do I still smell like pig cum?

 

[Chiara2003]

Can u jus mooove left alittle… i nooo can sees television

 

[TammCa]

you're taking up to much room in bed, can you move ? Like to the living room couch

 

[Chiara2003]

omg…. Ur sooo heavy ?

 

[MrsShemon]

Ah......I really miss the stallion

 

[TammCa]

obviously your definition of big and my definition of big are polar opposites

 

[TammCa]

was it good ? well just when did you start and when did you finish ?

 

[Chiara2003]

Yes…. Definitely NOT doing this again! ?

 

[TammCa]

well as the old saying goes -An A for effort, but that was a F-

 

[TammCa]

Maybe in a different life you were a Minuteman, now I believe in reincarnation.

 

[Chiara2003]

No…. That defs not the same as picture u sending ?

 

[ZPLS7171]

you need to shower

 

[Ted Danson Machine]

Who are you and what did you do with my waifu body pillow?

 

[saddlebum66]

"My Emission, should you decide to accept it..."

 

[LoneWolfen]

Keep sucking, i've just farted.

 

[bayareacpl]

1) Dad is going to be so jealous if he finds out, Uncle Joe.

2) You’re way better at this than your brother/friend.

 

[Chiara2003]

Are u cold??‍

 

[LoneWolfen]

Fucking whith you Is like to throw a broom in an empty hallway.

 

[Vermilion]

1, 2, 3...... FIRE!!!

 

[doublelemon]

I gotta fart?

 

[KenGinMo]

I thought it was just gas, do you need a towel?

 

[k9Queen]

Hurry up, your Uber is almost here.

 

[Goattobeloved]

Classic one:
"Keep sucking. (this time) I'll warn you before I cum"

 

[Duramax96]

Me: Damn you got a big pussy. Damn you got a big pussy.

Why did you say it twice?

Me: I didn’t