Top things not to say during sex

[Klondike bar]

Are we done yet?... I'm bored

 

[Ilikealotm]

If you find a dildo or a bone in there pull it out for me.

 

[Duramax96]

Me - I never knew fursuit sex was SO good!

Woman - That’s my husky Pearl!

 

[TammCa]

are you in ?

 

[knotarguing]

Sorry if I have you called Rex

 

[FordLannock]

God I miss my dog now, hurry up!

 

[TammCa]

come back when you grow a knott , LOL

 

[FordLannock]

No, that was nice, but we can still be friends.

 

[BlueBull]

Wife asks whats the best sex youve ever had ( it's a trap)
And you answer the cow

 

[Chucky123]

You're done already?

 

[aragos32727]

I think I'm gay now

 

[Erja]

Who' s watch is this ?

 

[Mikki]

what are we having for lunch

 

[Ghost.River]

Pulling out a hypodermic needle... "I just saw Pulp Fiction again last night! I love that scene where they inject Uma Thurman in the heart! Stay still. If I don't get it just right, you'll die immediately"

 

[DarkWolfNL]

you keep going im gonna play animal crossing while you busy

 

[FloofyNewfie]

I know I said I'd do anything for a Klondike bar, but I shouldn't have stooped so low!

 

[DarkWolfNL]

damn this your ass, your sister has a much better one

 

[saddlebum66]

No Darling, its putting YOUR foot in your mouth, not mine

 

[Knottypat]

Your dog fucks me better

 

[ZoophileTgirl]

Am I your first?

 

[TamTheTwin]

Poggers

 

[Vermilion]

Boom! Herpes, baby!!!

 

[humananimal]

I am already pregnant by my other boyfriend.

 

[Cressida]

These are from the movie Fight Club!

" I wanna your abortion."
"God, I haven't been fucked like that since grade school!" - Marla Singer

- YouTube

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Jump to 1:55

 

[Ted Danson Machine]

Dam, that really got rid of my itch

 

[Steven Raccoon]

I need to remove your used tampon from my asshole.

 

[Ted Danson Machine]

In this light, you look a lot like your mom

 

[Bloeejoee]

Why does it smell like long John silver's in here?

 

[Cowboyed1962]

I'm a old cowboy, I like to get in then whisper another gals name in her ear, see if I can hang on for 8 seconds.

 

[Ted Danson Machine]

I hope you don't mind my musk