Married but alone in this ... you too?

Married male here plenty of desires and I will definitely fulfill them. Just wish there was a way to bring it in to the bedroom with the wife. Maybe once she’s tied up on the bed (she likes bondage) “accidentally” allow the dog to get by the gates and let him lick her a few times. Maybe in that horny bliss she could be accepting. Either way would be a way to open a convo about it wether it end up bad or good.
 
Knottytop88 said:
Yes! I don’t think the Convo would go well..or would it 🧐 I’ll never know
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Yes I think that is a dilemma for many of us. Knowing our spouses as we think we do we assume they wouldn't be into it. Maybe a few would and we'd be pleasantly surprised. But let's face it most would not. And the downside of bringing it up could be devastating. So like you, I'll probably go with my assumption and never know. :(
 
eastcoastknot said:
Married male here plenty of desires and I will definitely fulfill them. Just wish there was a way to bring it in to the bedroom with the wife. Maybe once she’s tied up on the bed (she likes bondage) “accidentally” allow the dog to get by the gates and let him lick her a few times. Maybe in that horny bliss she could be accepting. Either way would be a way to open a convo about it wether it end up bad or good.
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I hear you, finding creative ways to bring it up in conversation so that you could guage her interest but back off easily if it doesn't go well. Maybe some others on here (perhaps anyone married who did bring it up to their spouse) would have some suggestions for all of us, in case we decide to go that direction.
 
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RiverPhoenix said:
I am fairly new here and not sure if this thread will be helpful or just duplicative (if so feel free to ignore), but I see a few conversations going back a ways about married persons (male and female) either who can't tell their partner, their partner isn't interested, etc.. Thought maybe a consolidated thread for those of us in that situation might be a good way for some us to share our interests and experiences, what we hope to get out of being here, connect with like-minded individuals, etc. Or is there a group for this or should there be (I have no idea how the groups work lol)? Or feel free to message me directly if you want to discuss. My preference is to discuss not so much what's wrong with our current situation or partner (some people just aren't into it) but focus on more on what we can do to feel more fulfilled living with this interest. Hopefully that makes sense to someone out there. :)
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I'm in the same boat... My wife knows but doesn't have any interest. This is to the point I am now separated from her as I which to at list watch porn with no judging... 🤷‍♂️
 
Alexzoo1 said:
I'm in the same boat... My wife knows but doesn't have any interest. This is to the point I am now separated from her as I which to at list watch porn with no judging... 🤷‍♂️
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Sorry to hear about your situation sounds pretty rough. The separation, and the judging, I think that's what we all fear. Hopefully you can find some support here, lots of open-minded people.

Hope also that things work out the way you want, whatever you decide to do next in the relationship. You deserve to be happy and get what you want and need.
 
I see this so often: "iam married and I feel so alone.... can't tell her.... Blaaaaaa.... Cryyyyy...."

If you are so insecure about each others sex life as a married couple that you can't talk about simple thinks like what gets your weiner hard and what not.... I always wonder how the fuck you got that far and why for God sake you are married in the first place????
 
RiverPhoenix said:
Sorry to hear about your situation sounds pretty rough. The separation, and the judging, I think that's what we all fear. Hopefully you can find some support here, lots of open-minded people.

Hope also that things work out the way you want, whatever you decide to do next in the relationship. You deserve to be happy and get what you want and need.
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Thanks man!
 
Wow. I personally believe in honesty above all else myself. No need to keep secrets folks if it aint going to work it just is not worth it. Better to be single than be hiding from your partner. It is one reason I am still single at 50. I always had a fear of not being accepted for my zooish ways and knew that it would be hard to find a woman that would be accepting of it and harder yet if she did would she be compatible with me in other ways? Worse yet I was afraid I might be outed or turned into the police. A lie is like a festering, rotten tooth it does not get better only worse and has way of poisoning other aspects of your relationship. Just be honest an see where it goes. If it blows up so be it, it should have been broached before you tied the knot. I believe in honesty above all else in all things. Especially with the one you love and cherish. There truly is no love or trust where there is no honesty.
 
Schuppentier said:
I see this so often: "iam married and I feel so alone.... can't tell her.... Blaaaaaa.... Cryyyyy...."

If you are so insecure about each others sex life as a married couple that you can't talk about simple thinks like what gets your weiner hard and what not.... I always wonder how the fuck you got that far and why for God sake you are married in the first place????
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Exactly what I have been thinking everytime I see this subject posted on this site.
 
RiverPhoenix said:
I wouldn't say a lapse in courage but just testing the waters. But yea, I can understand the water was cold and offered not much in the way of hope for including her in your interest. As was said in another thread, some (many) are not into this and you can't force them to be. So hopefully you can find people here and other places to support your interests. You are NOT alone.
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Of course, we can't force anything on anyone, she knows I saw it, if she was interested I'm sure she would ask my opinion about what she had seen and the conversation would have evolved.
 
RiverPhoenix said:
Yes I think that is a dilemma for many of us. Knowing our spouses as we think we do we assume they wouldn't be into it. Maybe a few would and we'd be pleasantly surprised. But let's face it most would not. And the downside of bringing it up could be devastating. So like you, I'll probably go with my assumption and never know. :(
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Sometimes doubt is the best answer to our questions.
 
RiverPhoenix said:
I am fairly new here and not sure if this thread will be helpful or just duplicative (if so feel free to ignore), but I see a few conversations going back a ways about married persons (male and female) either who can't tell their partner, their partner isn't interested, etc.. Thought maybe a consolidated thread for those of us in that situation might be a good way for some us to share our interests and experiences, what we hope to get out of being here, connect with like-minded individuals, etc. Or is there a group for this or should there be (I have no idea how the groups work lol)? Or feel free to message me directly if you want to discuss. My preference is to discuss not so much what's wrong with our current situation or partner (some people just aren't into it) but focus on more on what we can do to feel more fulfilled living with this interest. Hopefully that makes sense to someone out there. :)
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I am alone in it also male k9 . My wife has no interest
 
Thanks to all those sharing so far. And listen, I get it that there are people who aren't in this situation who don't understand. Ideally we all want to be in a marriage where you are able to share your innermost thoughts and desires and have those accepted. But not sure how many are in a situation where something like zoo (which is taboo in much of society and illegal, after all) is easy to bring up. When the consequences of doing so can be devastating if it goes wrong. I submit it's not the same as saying you have an interest in, well, most other things.

Have seen lots of threads and posts where many people (not just married people) are afraid to tell anyone in their lives, or try to suppress their feelings. But I also would agree that we shouldn't complain about it ad nauseam, if we have decided to stay in our marriages, but instead begin to focus on we're going to do about it from here. That's where I think this community can help and support each other, or at least I hope so. I applaud those trying to figure it all out.
 
RiverPhoenix said:
I am fairly new here and not sure if this thread will be helpful or just duplicative (if so feel free to ignore), but I see a few conversations going back a ways about married persons (male and female) either who can't tell their partner, their partner isn't interested, etc.. Thought maybe a consolidated thread for those of us in that situation might be a good way for some us to share our interests and experiences, what we hope to get out of being here, connect with like-minded individuals, etc. Or is there a group for this or should there be (I have no idea how the groups work lol)? Or feel free to message me directly if you want to discuss. My preference is to discuss not so much what's wrong with our current situation or partner (some people just aren't into it) but focus on more on what we can do to feel more fulfilled living with this interest. Hopefully that makes sense to someone out there. :)
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Not married but I’ve certainly never told any of my partners and always stop altogether when in a relationship and sometimes it’s torture
 
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