bad life advice to live by

[knotty365]

Cant tell if a light socket or electrical outlet is working? Put your penis in it to find out.

 

[xXSINNERXx]

“Save yourself for the right one” All I have to say to that is… good luck ?

 

[MrsShemon]

Don't buy food, you will just eat it or throw it away anyway.

 

[Puhp]

if you cut tennis balls in half, you can fit more of them in a can

 

[Valkiria]

Eat shit! It's not possible for so many flies to be wrong!
?
?

 

[knotty365]

When in doubt, fuck it

 

[horseshoe]

In a situation where you don't know what to do, tell the truth.

 

[FloofyNewfie]

Each cigarette you smoke takes 11 minutes off of your student loan debt! ???

 

[saddlebum66]

Did you know everything you eat turns to shit?

 

[Valkiria]

Did you know everything you eat turns to shit?

It can't be!!! Who told you?!

 

[Nosfura2]

Getting back with your ex is a great idea...!!

 

[Predlov]

Your secret stays safe, if you bury enough bodies.

 

[Flint]

You can’t win the lottery if you don’t buy lots of tickets!

 

[JT Bullitt]

Putting a fork in the microwave actually makes it heat your food faster.

 

[Allyhorsegirl]

Strangers candy tastes better