Just asking "Whats the first thing i need to do" is very open ended and general, it can point to many things from realizing one's self to looking up taking giant knots. can you be a bit more specific?
Maybe try to feel comfortable with yourself and your own feelings. Don't let other people tell you what's wrong and bad. You are good the way you are. And as long as you don't harm people or any animal, you're perfectly ok to live your own life.