ever had a "that boy/girl is totally dead by now" moment when watching older porn?

[nekdoneco123]

i was in the mood for some porn so i went through some of the petlust vids (i think they're like 15 years old now?) and like a minute in, all i can think about is "this dane girl is totally dead by now". got completely turned off and had to just delete all of it, somehow felt very wrong to even possess it. am i the weird one for even having this moment of realization or is it something someone else had too?

kinda feels like yet another thing to be jealous of "normal" ppl. at least i think it's not that common to watch older vid from someone like anna gray or whatever her name is and just know she's not there anymore.

guess i'm gonna go delete most if not all of my collection now. no need for more proof of how fleeting having something meaningful with a canine is....

 

[mammalsexual]

i was in the mood for some porn so i went through some of the petlust vids (i think they're like 15 years old now?) and like a minute in, all i can think about is "this dane girl is totally dead by now". got completely turned off and had to just delete all of it, somehow felt very wrong to even possess it. am i the weird one for even having this moment of realization or is it something someone else had too?

kinda feels like yet another thing to be jealous of "normal" ppl. at least i think it's not that common to watch older vid from someone like anna gray or whatever her name is and just know she's not there anymore.

guess i'm gonna go delete most if not all of my collection now. no need for more proof of how fleeting having something meaningful with a canine is..

Hate to sound harsh and judgmental here @nekdoneco123, but I think you're being a bit neurotic and melodramatic with your thinking on this. As long as the participants were enjoying the moment, who cares if one or more of them is no longer alive?

Occasionally I still like to watch videos I made of myself making love to my first marefriend who passed away in 2018. She was the corny literal "love of my life" and it brings back sweet memories of the amazing times we shared. I'm glad I made them and wished I'd made more (and taken more pictures of her, and not all of them sexual).

Your last sentence is telling: you're fixated on the short length of time we get to spend with our animal loves, and seeing these old Petlust videos only emphasizes this unwelcome reality.

I only had seven years with my first marefriend before her time on earth was cut short much too soon, but I am so grateful for every second I had with her. I loved her more than anything, and it was a long, tough-but necessary- period of mourning when she died.

Everything in life is fleeting, it's only a matter of degrees...Like Warren Zevon said "Enjoy every sandwich".

 

[CetaceanLover23]

Hate to sound harsh and judgmental here @nekdoneco123, but I think you're being a bit neurotic and melodramatic with your thinking on this. As long as the participants were enjoying the moment, who cares if one or more of them is no longer alive?

Occasionally I still like to watch videos I made of myself making love to my first marefriend who passed away in 2018. She was the corny literal "love of my life" and it brings back sweet memories of the amazing times we shared. I'm glad I made them and wished I'd made more (and taken more pictures of her, and not all of them sexual).

Your last sentence is telling: you're fixated on the short length of time we get to spend with our animal loves, and seeing these old Petlust videos only emphasizes this unwelcome reality.

I only had seven years with my first marefriend before her time on earth was cut short much too soon, but I am so grateful for every second I had with her. I loved her more than anything, and it was a long, tough-but necessary- period of mourning when she died.

Everything in life is fleeting, it's only a matter of degrees...Like Warren Zevon said "Enjoy every sandwich".

Once again you've hit the nail on the head Mammal. You are absolutely correct.

 

[nekdoneco123]

Hate to sound harsh and judgmental here @nekdoneco123, but I think you're being a bit neurotic and melodramatic with your thinking on this. As long as the participants were enjoying the moment, who cares if one or more of them is no longer alive?

guess i had a bit of a melodramatic moment and it really shouldn't matter, but it does for some reason hence me asking if someone else had something similar as well. maybe it's just me projecting or seeing stuff i also had at one point.

Occasionally I still like to watch videos I made of myself making love to my first marefriend who passed away in 2018. She was the corny literal "love of my life" and it brings back sweet memories of the amazing times we shared. I'm glad I made them and wished I'd made more (and taken more pictures of her, and not all of them sexual).

i also lost the "love of my life" after only 5 years and the only picture i ever took of him is my profile pic and i hate myself for it being the only picture. i don't even remember how did his bark sound like anymore...

Your last sentence is telling: you're fixated on the short length of time we get to spend with our animal loves, and seeing these old Petlust videos only emphasizes this unwelcome reality.

to be honest, i think i'm more fixated in the general unfairness of how short a canine lifespan is compared to ours. i don't want to sound disrespectful, but i don't think an equine person can really relate. average lifespan of a horse is like what, a quadruple of a dog?

"Enjoy every sandwich"

i do just that, it's just it seems one only gets to taste the best sandwich only once. and after that you just subconsciously compare every new sandwich with the best one.

thanks for your thoughtful reply

 

[Ruben]

i was in the mood for some porn so i went through some of the petlust vids (i think they're like 15 years old now?) and like a minute in, all i can think about is "this dane girl is totally dead by now". got completely turned off and had to just delete all of it, somehow felt very wrong to even possess it. am i the weird one for even having this moment of realization or is it something someone else had too?

This happens to me a lot, but not just or primarily with porn. I've thought the same when watching TV series, movies, documentaries, especially since my own companion has died.

But my reaction to that thought isn't to delete stuff.

 

[Disanima]

Well, I sometimes think the same thing when watching older porn, but not in such a depressive way, more like acknowledging a matter of fact.
Even some people that were in older zoo movies are dead by now, but that moment was captured when they were both alive, so I don't really see the problem...
I mean, if I had pics of my loved ones that are passed away, I wouldn't be so willing to delete them and forget just because they are dead. But we are not all the same, others prefer to forget because it's just too painful to remember.
My advice is to focus on the present and to keep the good memories in your heart.
I know that for a zoo exclusive this is harder to cope with, but life goes on and doesn't stop even while you are mourning your lover.

 

[Maldoror]

I'm thinking about that all the time, but I feel like I'm honoring those dogs watching their videos, in the same manner I do when I listen to music made by dead musicians, and wishing they still would be between us.

 

[mammalsexual]

to be honest, i think i'm more fixated in the general unfairness of how short a canine lifespan is compared to ours. i don't want to sound disrespectful, but i don't think an equine person can really relate. average lifespan of a horse is like what, a quadruple of a dog?

For the record, I'm not just an equine person...I'm a "mammalsexual"....

My sexual and romantic interests are much broader than horses, I just seem to have a particular affinity and ability to connect with equines. Just because the average lifespan of a horse is a lot longer than that of a canine does not make the loss any less difficult. One never knows how long any being has on this planet either. Unexpected death is always a possibility. I would love to have a dog (as well as sheep, goats, pigs and other animals as well), but right now I don't have the means or time to care for all those critters. It's just an unfortunate reality that our partners lifespans are much shorter than ours. But we all must process this reality in our own way.

 

[CetaceanLover23]

For the record, I'm not just an equine person...I'm a "mammalsexual"....

My sexual and romantic interests are much broader than horses, I just seem to have a particular affinity and ability to connect with equines. Just because the average lifespan of a horse is a lot longer than that of a canine does not make the loss any less difficult. One never knows how long any being has on this planet either. Unexpected death is always a possibility. I would love to have a dog (as well as sheep, goats, pigs and other animals as well), but right now I don't have the means or time to care for all those critters. It's just an unfortunate reality that our partners lifespans are much shorter than ours. But we all must process this reality in our own way.

You are a fantastic writer Mammal. perfect grammar! I like that.

 

[mammalsexual]

Thanks, it takes time and effort for me to write complete coherent sentences.

 

[CetaceanLover23]

Thanks, it takes time and effort for me to write complete coherent sentences.

Right there with you man.

 

[Pillar]

guess i had a bit of a melodramatic moment and it really shouldn't matter, but it does for some reason hence me asking if someone else had something similar as well. maybe it's just me projecting or seeing stuff i also had at one point.

i also lost the "love of my life" after only 5 years and the only picture i ever took of him is my profile pic and i hate myself for it being the only picture. i don't even remember how did his bark sound like anymore...

to be honest, i think i'm more fixated in the general unfairness of how short a canine lifespan is compared to ours. i don't want to sound disrespectful, but i don't think an equine person can really relate. average lifespan of a horse is like what, a quadruple of a dog?

i do just that, it's just it seems one only gets to taste the best sandwich only once. and after that you just subconsciously compare every new sandwich with the best one.

thanks for your thoughtful reply

I got a few words for you that you need to hear.



Let it go man!