Advice on Self-Acceptance?

sleepteaf

sleepteaf

Lurker
(Apologies if this is in the wrong forum. Let me know if it is)

I figured out that I'm a zoophile mid-2019, but I have very intense internalized zoophobia (is that the right word?). I do not think of sex with non-humans and interspecies relationships as abusive, but I can't help but feel like I'm sick or I'm an abuser for being attracted to animals. I find myself wishing I was "normal" and "healthy" as well. Does anyone have advice on coping with these thoughts and accepting myself? It's been eating me up for awhile.
 
One thing that helped me getting around to accepting my fetish/inclinations/attraction was talking about it. Not in RL, mind you, the taboo is to great, but in forums like this one (well actually BF, but that's dead and this is the successor of it) and on porn imageboards. As long as it's online and I can remain largely anonymous (as much as I want, actually), I'll be open and up front about it and that helped A LOT.
 
sleepteaf said:
(Apologies if this is in the wrong forum. Let me know if it is)

I figured out that I'm a zoophile mid-2019, but I have very intense internalized zoophobia (is that the right word?). I do not think of sex with non-humans and interspecies relationships as abusive, but I can't help but feel like I'm sick or I'm an abuser for being attracted to animals. I find myself wishing I was "normal" and "healthy" as well. Does anyone have advice on coping with these thoughts and accepting myself? It's been eating me up for awhile.
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This seems to come up a lot in the forum recently.
I guess a lot of zoos go through this.
What helped me was writing down almost a book worth of my thoughts, opinions and history and basically take apart my own mind and put it back together. It helped me to understand where my feelings come from and which way they are going and whether I am a bad person or not.
Doing something like this is hard work since you have to go deep but it was worth it.
 
pes said:
This seems to come up a lot in the forum recently.
I guess a lot of zoos go through this.
What helped me was writing down almost a book worth of my thoughts, opinions and history and basically take apart my own mind and put it back together. It helped me to understand where my feelings come from and which way they are going and whether I am a bad person or not.
Doing something like this is hard work since you have to go deep but it was worth it.
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Thank you so much. This seems like it would help as my mind jumps from one thing to the next without comprehending my thoughts, like I'm thinking but not really thinking. I'm gonna give writing a try for sure
 
Sedirae said:
One thing that helped me getting around to accepting my fetish/inclinations/attraction was talking about it. Not in RL, mind you, the taboo is to great, but in forums like this one (well actually BF, but that's dead and this is the successor of it) and on porn imageboards. As long as it's online and I can remain largely anonymous (as much as I want, actually), I'll be open and up front about it and that helped A LOT.
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That's part of why I joined zooville, but I've been too nervous to interact with people so far lol. I'm slowly opening up though and it feels like a huge weight on my chest has been lifted. And thanks for responding, I appreciate all the help ❤️
 
Trust can go a very long way to mentioning it in real. It's definitely not something to do as a norm, but keep in mind that almost everyone has something about themselves they are uncomfortable with and that has been a norm with humanity for a very long time. If trust is an issue in real (and I can certainly empathize with that) Then these places online are very good places as well. Only share what you feel safe sharing, don't compare yourself unfairly to everyone else. Be ethical. Just because you've seen some people with a similar desire as yours go about it in an unfair or unsafe way doesn't mean that you're like them.

Don't be afraid to ask yourself or others, just be prepared to think carefully one step at a time. Be careful and safe, both online and in real in regards to privately, but also if you ever try to do something with a trusting to-be partner.
 
So sorry that a baseless sense of taboo and fear of a legitimate orientation has trapped you inito thinking this way.

I can't really give any advice that hasn't already been given, be open and vocal about it in places where you feel safe and perhaps write all your thoughts down, or "take apart your mind and put it back together" as someone else put it.

If you need anyone to talk to or just want to chat, I'm always open for a DM and there's quite a lot of threads on here too to check out so :)
 
I never once thought it was wrong for me to be this way. Dogs are just better than people for me, from their look, smell, personality. I've been emotionally as well as sexually active with dogs since I was 12 and I'm now in my late 30's. It's hard to explain really... Life is complete and feels correct when I'm with a dog, even if its not sexual, and I feel wrong and uncomfortable when I'm around people.

I really don't know what sort of advice to give but maybe hearing the stories of us who are who we are and let that that give you strength to live you're life.

This is my first post here so thanks for moving me to talk lol.
 
it is what it is - those that sexually interact with their pets (like me) are normal
yes your normal
- the feeling of it's wrong or not to be done or dirty or an inter-species relationships is abusive
is what society projects on us as a set of rules that we are spoze to follow to be a good human being.
well we all break some laws and this one is one ill continue to break because some laws are stupid and
my animal bonds mean more to me than anything else, if my dogs don't want to interact they let me know
and i wait on them to be giving and want to interact with me.
like anything different to the mob mentality - keep it to your self (or with-in zoo community) and enjoy your sexual interaction with your zoo friends.
 
I felt the same as you many years bgack when I first accepted myself as zoo. It's a difficult thing to break.

What really helped me though, was speaking to other zoos, using sites like this. Just being able to know I'm not alone in the way I feel. Many 'normal' people are zoos too. You probably know someone who secretly is. It's more wide spread than you think, and you're not sick or wrong for feeling the way so many others do. It helped me to write on sites like this, or in a diary, get my feelings out and be able to wrap my head around them in a more constructive way.

I would really suggest doing some writing. It can make your feelings seem more concrete and having it written down makes it easier to have something 'tangible' to look at and analyze.E

Once I found out I wasn't alone and that there's many others like me out there I started to come to terms with it. I met a lot of great zoo friends and it helped me feel like I was among understanding.
 
Honestly, what I think that makes people think that it’s “wrong” is what the majority of what society thinks of it. If you and the dog/horse or whatever enjoy it, how can you say that it’s wrong? In a lot of amateur videos, probably most, you can see that the dog actually enjoys, and is really excited, to have sex with a human. If they didn’t really want to, they would react in a way to avoid it. Forcing them to, like in a lot of Asian porn videos, would deem wrong in a lot of people’s eyes. You can see it if you really look at the emotions. It’s just something that I’ve noticed. Dogs really have a sense of emotion like humans. Which makes many people choose them for pets.
 
Thank you guys for all help. I've been really worn out due to work so I don't have the energy to reply to everyone right now, but I deeply appreciate it
 
Look mate, nobody can help you accept who you are.
You are the only one who can do that.

Some people have a need to "fit in", while others simply couldn't care less if they're different.
Its easier for the latter catagory than the former, but not imposible.

Being who you are is the cornerstone in a persons overall happiness in life, you just need to decide who you are and embrace it.
 
sleepteaf said:
(Apologies if this is in the wrong forum. Let me know if it is)

I figured out that I'm a zoophile mid-2019, but I have very intense internalized zoophobia (is that the right word?). I do not think of sex with non-humans and interspecies relationships as abusive, but I can't help but feel like I'm sick or I'm an abuser for being attracted to animals. I find myself wishing I was "normal" and "healthy" as well. Does anyone have advice on coping with these thoughts and accepting myself? It's been eating me up for awhile.
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I went through something similar but not as intense and if you’ve come to this forum I can tell you that you’re making great progress on accepting your zoo nature already.
I’d focus on building non-sexual bonds with animals first and foremost. Once you’ve gained a mutual understanding with another being (of any species) then you’ll know how they speak to you and once you understand their language then abuse can’t happen unintentionally.
 
TheSeeker said:
I’d focus on building non-sexual bonds with animals first and foremost. Once you’ve gained a mutual understanding with another being (of any species) then you’ll know how they speak to you and once you understand their language then abuse can’t happen unintentionally.
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This! Learning to appreciate the animal you are emotionally and physically attracted to before doing anything is pretty important. I learned how dogs and k9's in general act towards each other as well as how they want to interact with humans. We bred dogs to fulfill roles within society and they have a deeper connection to humans than say a wolf or a fox, kinda like how dogs instinctively as puppies get pointing at something where as wolves have to learn over time.
 
adog_isme said:
This! Learning to appreciate the animal you are emotionally and physically attracted to before doing anything is pretty important. I learned how dogs and k9's in general act towards each other as well as how they want to interact with humans. We bred dogs to fulfill roles within society and they have a deeper connection to humans than say a wolf or a fox, kinda like how dogs instinctively as puppies get pointing at something where as wolves have to learn over time.
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This is very good advice for the OP. I Agree.
 
sleepteaf said:
(Apologies if this is in the wrong forum. Let me know if it is)

I figured out that I'm a zoophile mid-2019, but I have very intense internalized zoophobia (is that the right word?). I do not think of sex with non-humans and interspecies relationships as abusive, but I can't help but feel like I'm sick or I'm an abuser for being attracted to animals. I find myself wishing I was "normal" and "healthy" as well. Does anyone have advice on coping with these thoughts and accepting myself? It's been eating me up for awhile.
Click to expand...
If you don't want to ever harm an animal, then that starts with learning respect for yourself. People do shameful things out of a lack of respect for themselves. Many zoophiles in the early days seriously hurt animals because, in their minds, they had only been able to deal with their zoophilia through total moral detachment, which is really a form of self-loathing.

Learn self-respect, and teach other zoos self-respect. It is self-respect that causes us to behave morally.
 
TheSeeker said:
That was me as a kid but as an adult… must’ve been an earthmoving discovery.
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Until i was 20 and deployed for Desert Storm i had never even heard about anyone like myself, let alone seen it.
Stoped over in Madrid and (being 20 and in the Military) had to check out the big ass sex shops while i was there, lo and behold while flipping through the xxx video machine, i kept finding animal porn.
6 years later i got online and it was the first thing i searched for, found the Newsgroups first, then the Telnet "talkers" and the rest is history
 
Gunslinger1X said:
Until i was 20 and deployed for Desert Storm i had never even heard about anyone like myself, let alone seen it.
Stoped over in Madrid and (being 20 and in the Military) had to check out the big ass sex shops while i was there, lo and behold while flipping through the xxx video machine, i kept finding animal porn.
6 years later i got online and it was the first thing i searched for, found the Newsgroups first, then the Telnet "talkers" and the rest is history
Click to expand...
I love Spain and Italy, too. I stopped into Barcelona and Naples when I was 20 and a merchant marine cadet. Saw so many intact dogs it was hard to walk in a straight line at times and the sex shops were something else.
Seems like people over there would get a lot more exposure to zoophilia/opportunities for zoo sex… I was jealous lol
 
TheSeeker said:
I love Spain and Italy, too. I stopped into Barcelona and Naples when I was 20 and a merchant marine cadet. Saw so many intact dogs it was hard to walk in a straight line at times and the sex shops were something else.
Seems like people over there would get a lot more exposure to zoophilia/opportunities for zoo sex… I was jealous lol
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You and me both mate, hardest part was acting "disgusted" when they popped in an old VHS of the stuff in the dayroom as a shock value thing
 
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