When you confide you're zoo

B

BlueBeard

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Okay. Who's been here: You confided in a close, trusted friend that you're zoo. But they didn't respond with much. That's not quite what you expected, but now while you're second-guessing everything, you can't not even sure what it was you stood to gain from doing letting the cat out of the bag anymore. Why did you need them to know? No way to take it back, but it's killing you not to know where you stand in their eyes now.

Silence is agony.

As I was thinking about that this morning, I thought wait a minute, no no no... just a second.... silence doesn't necessarily mean you blew it. You did what you had to do. No one could talk you out of it, not even you. So now let the other person process it, do what they have to do.

I remembered when someone announced their interest to me, and ... I was silent. Take into account I've been zoo since I was born, seems like, rooted deep within me from before I was sexual, just curious about "bits."

Despite that, when a college friend of mine, taking advantage of a private conversation in my room where others couldn't hear, blurted out to me how he just couldn't help himself around dog cock, I was silent.

He had a big old dog at home, with a massive cock and balls he said, and he just loved to jack that dog off, even suck it. Came to him one day he just had to try it and he did. Dog liked it, so it became a regular thing. Described size, taste, sensation. What sucking it was like.

I was confused about what to do. He and I had never talked about sexual matters before (except how some high school girls he knew gave great blowjobs, but I was definitely not interested in that conversation, since I was a student teacher).

For this dog stuff, thoughts were swirling through my head. I was definitely glued to my seat, totally interested. But I was also alarmed that he so suddenly, out of the blue, he announced this to me. I wondered about *why* he was telling me. Trying to get a reaction? Wanting to know if it shocked me? Was it even true? Or was he setting me up, giving me opportunity to confess I did, too, before jumping back and saying, "Holy shit! I was just *kidding*! But you really do????"

I was going to be a teacher. Something like this gets out? I'd be ruined. So I went "poker face." I just listened, mostly. I remember asking him how the dog responded, like... did it "let" him or struggle to get away? Did it come to him for it after that, or did he have to initiate it? Each question, as I recall this scene, came out of me as if I was just trying to think of something to say. I can't remember if I said it was interesting or cool or not. I do remember I was tight-lipped. I confessed nothing, or nothing more than might be inferred from my pretended calm and the nature of my questions, trying to ask what I thought a "non zoo" might ask. And it was over too soon. I *wanted* him to keep talking. But he ended it, thinking it was going nowhere, I guess.

He transferred that semester and we never got a chance to hang out again, never since that time. But it left a lasting impression. It was the moment that I decided next time this happens, I will pick up the other end of the line and join the discussion. And if he and I were ever to get together again, I'd want to pick that up with him, ask how that evolved or didn't afterward, share about me.

If you get silence in response when you confide in a friend, it may be you, too, have just given someone the same "turn point" in his zoo life. He may himself open up to others after that.

Those of you who've been on either side of a conversation like this, what happened in your case?
 
It was interesting, my partner dropped a huge hint to me when we were in the throes of lovemaking one evening. They told me how my endowment felt almost like a knot, and I asked if they’ve been knotted before. They blushed heavily and said yes, and the evening got much hotter afterwards :love:
 
fuck that - personal balance and lovers are more important than friends
also they are not true friends if they dis you for what you are
 
When my partner and I were in the beginning phase of our relationship we were testing our sexual parameters, in other words, we were fucking a LOT. During one of those wonderful all-day marathons, we stopped now and then to rehydrate or just take a breather while still getting to know each other. It was during one of these breaks that we were propped up in bed naked on the pillows and for some unknown reason I blurted "Have you ever known any guys who....you know...fooled around with their dog?" In retrospect, I think that it was so early in our relationship that I rationalized that I had much less to lose than if we were deep into the relationship that I saw forming.... So, I blurt the question and my guy, (who was raised on a farm by the way) chuckles and says " HEARD of it? I lost track of the times that I caught my little brother in the barn being railed by one of the farm dogs!".....WELL...I was stunned, but my dick was immediately as hard as blue steel, a dead give-away. I got flustered and covered my hardon with a pillow as I tried to backtrack with a more casual response. I replied "No! You're shitting me, right?". He went on to explain that "That sort of thing was not unusual at all for a lot of country boys" and that "It's just a phase that a lot of boys go through before they get a chance to get laid for real".
I instinctively knew better to pursue this line of questioning for one major reason: Whereas my dick had sprung up instantly at the subject, His had remained soft. I figured that my question was the best opening for him to say "Yeah I tried it and it's amazing!" but no such luck, so I dropped the subject. I've often wondered if he secretly knows about my involvement with dogs which has, by the way, continued throughout our relationship. Sometimes I've come home from house-sitting and dog walking with scratch marks but I've always been able to pass them off as the result of yard work or being clumsy. I really wish sometimes that he knew, but it's far too late at this point, so I just keep it to myself and enjoy my guilty pleasure on the side whenever the opportunity presents itself.
 
I came out to a total of 3 people, and I felt the same way afterwards each time. The feeling of having to tell someone, only to regret it when the silence came afterwards, and then even more silence in the coming days. Each time after coming out I would be on edge for at least 4 days, wondering if they would expose my secret to anyone else or just cut off contact with me in general. Coming out is a great thing if you can do it, but most people don't realize that the emotions caused by coming out can last days at a time.
 
I recently told my friend. After that night the silence was killing me, then he texted me saying it's cool, he didn't care. A few days later of silence and I was getting worried, but now it's all fine. We both keep making jokes about it, and it's enjoyable since I don't have to hide who I am. My favorite part of telling him was when he responded, "dude, you can't fuck a dog" and I replied, "yeah I can, and I will". Obviously something of that magnitude would require some time to respond honestly.
 
I learned the hard way during a disastrous 2-year Classic toxic relationship with a younger guy who had a self-denied alcohol and drug habit.
Before getting acquainted with his volcanic and fickle disposition, I made the mistake in my early infatuation of telling him close enough details that indicated my experience with canines. Looking back, I cringe as I try to remember just how much detail I told him. I must have told him far too much because...fast-forward 2 years of constant crisis-mode and the relationship was in a death-spiral. During one of the worst fights after he had shacked up with another guy during a drunken binge, it had devolved to blows. He stormed out of the 4-plex that we shared with three other neighbors of close proximity. I went out to the balcony to throw a bag after him and he yelled up at me at the top of his lungs: " Why don't you just go find a dog to fuck you?" The last zinger hit me hard but I surprised myself by not hesitating to yell back equally and as loudly " Yeah? I'll DO THAT. And when I do find him, he'll be twice the lover you were and immeasurably more faithful!" ( Jeezus at this point we were so far beyond Zoo Soap daytime TV and right into a case of Cops.
I still, cringe when I think of how vulnerable I had left myself. I gave my present (and years now) long-time partner several early-on hints as I told in another thread and has chosen to ignore the hints. So... I have decided it isn't always a good thing to burden someone else with our secrets. For me, divulging every single secret of my soul is not necessarily proof of my love. In my world, I have to live with the consequences of my decisions, not someone else. Luckily I have one long-distance friend who shares a certain degree of the same attraction to canines. His just isn't as much of a driving force behind his libido as mine but at least he can relate to some degree. And now, as I increasingly rely on this site as s steam valve, I thank everybody who has engaged me with a conversation or reply. q:- )
 
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My husband behaved like an obnoxious child like he does about everything in his existence that he has trouble understanding. I knew this man, by then, and he is never going to change. I am married to an overgrown toddler.

I thoroughly trust him, though. I would not have married him if I did not thoroughly trust him. I think it is kind of loony to marry someone if you do not trust them. It is not that I think I have to tell people all my darkest secrets as proof of my affection. The point is that I would sooner be dead than marry someone that I had to be fearful of for any reason. Talking about my sexual deviance was just as natural as telling him I liked grayson cheese.

He was a child about the grayson cheese, too. He walked around the house holding his nose and spraying stuff in the air for half a week, while swearing that it had seeped into the walls. He also once threw away the aluminum pot that I boil water in, calling it a "prison pot," but if I swear that if I question his attachment to his own worthless junk, he will call up his mother and cry into the phone.

That said, I have never been afraid of him. He is at heart a good person, and he is a loyal husband.

If I am afraid of somebody, I get that person out of my life, and if I cannot get that person out of my life peacefully, I poison him and then dump his body in a river. I have never had to do that because I have never been unsuccessful at evading people that were actually dangerous.

My husband stayed fully in-character. He was exactly like himself.
 
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I have never told anyone that I did not know was a zoo already and even then I still really worried about it. I don't trust people. I have seen how they can easily betray someone that they professed to love. I can not take that risk no mater how much I would like to have someone to talk to.
If someone were to "come out" to me I would not tell them I was. I would be understanding and I would explain the legalities of such things and I would tell them that I was not going to judge them or tell anyone about it. But I would not tell them I was. Definitely not right away, maybe never and probably not for a long time.
 
BlueBeard said:
Silence is agony.
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So fucking true, I'd much rather someone lash out immediately rather than say nothing. Then I know to stay the hell away from them and don't say any more.
Sadly though, silence and rejection is the normal response, at least with the people I've said it to. Even if they later accept or embrace it, most of the time they just avoid the subject for a while or get annoyed if I keep talking about it, or even treat me like some spectacle.
 
Panda Chen said:
I have never told anyone that I did not know was a zoo already and even then I still really worried about it. I don't trust people. I have seen how they can easily betray someone that they professed to love. I can not take that risk no mater how much I would like to have someone to talk to.
If someone were to "come out" to me I would not tell them I was. I would be understanding and I would explain the legalities of such things and I would tell them that I was not going to judge them or tell anyone about it. But I would not tell them I was. Definitely not right away, maybe never and probably not for a long time.
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Oh, I disagree with your take on people. They are completely trustworthy! I have total faith that anything I tell someone, they can't help but tell someone else. You can set your watch to it. Just a fact of life you have to expect.

Have I myself done it? Like to say I haven't. But dirt on someone is currency burning a hole in your pocket. In the right situation, without a doubt you'll spend it.
 
BlueBeard said:
Oh, I disagree with your take on people. They are completely trustworthy! I have total faith that anything I tell someone, they can't help but tell someone else. You can set your watch to it. Just a fact of life you have to expect.

Have I myself done it? Like to say I haven't. But dirt on someone is currency burning a hole in your pocket. In the right situation, without a doubt you'll spend it.
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Just gotta balance that dirt out, me and my friend have pointed out that we have so much dirt on each other that if we ever got in a fight or stopped being friends, that we could never say anything because we would ruin both of our lives.
 
220licco said:
Just gotta balance that dirt out, me and my friend have pointed out that we have so much dirt on each other that if we ever got in a fight or stopped being friends, that we could never say anything because we would ruin both of our lives.
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So a group of zoos know each other. One gets in legal trouble. Would that one sell the others out if he or she thought it could buy his or her freedom. Probably most or all of the group would say no, but it might be different if he or she is actually facing jail. At that point "the dirt" is already out for that person.
 
Panda Chen said:
So a group of zoos know each other. One gets in legal trouble. Would that one sell the others out if he or she thought it could buy his or her freedom. Probably most or all of the group would say no, but it might be different if he or she is actually facing jail. At that point "the dirt" is already out for that person.
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This friend isn't a zoo, I've never met zoos in person. I'm sure we both have plenty of legal dirt on each other too, so I assume he'd realize how much more we'd all be in for if someone said something. Might but freedom on one thing only to be hurt for another. But I'm sure there are scenarios where anyone would talk. I considered this one worth the risk.
 
I'm a complete coward. No one in my genetic family would understand, there are no other horse people, barely dog or cat people. So no, outside of here, I have no confidence. You are my family. I would have nowhere else to start.
 
TeslaModel3 said:
I came out to a total of 3 people, and I felt the same way afterwards each time. The feeling of having to tell someone, only to regret it when the silence came afterwards, and then even more silence in the coming days. Each time after coming out I would be on edge for at least 4 days, wondering if they would expose my secret to anyone else or just cut off contact with me in general. Coming out is a great thing if you can do it, but most people don't realize that the emotions caused by coming out can last days at a time.
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w
TO ALL ZOOS: my advice would be to just keep to yourelf cause most peopledon't care and dont want to know
 
I first came out to my girlfriend about four years ago. We'd been together for seven. I remember being super nervous when i confessed that "sometimes i watch animal porn". I was expecting a disgusted or confused look from her but instead, she nonchalantly said "oh yeah me too, I've watched a lot". Needless to say our relationship has gotten a lot more interesting since. Coming out is a gamble, but can be sooooooooooo worth it. I'm the luckiest fuck ever.
 
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