My mate is getting agressive towards other males and I feel awful about it.

W

wilderknot

Tourist
Hey,

I have a 2yo german shepherd I adopted about a year ago. When I got him, he was basically perfect with every type of dog, he had been very well socialised and that's one of the main reasons why I picked him and not another dog. I knew he was still young and his personality would change a lot, but it looked like a very good base for a social and confident dog, which is what I was searching for.

But these last few months, he's been getting more and more "dominant" (by lack of a better word) and agressive towards the vast majority of other intact males. He's absolutely perfect with female dogs, puppies, most neutered males and old intact males, he's very playful and social. But it looks like he has a "need" to feel like he's in charge when he sees other intact males. As long as they're not 100% submissive, he won't be happy and he'll be agressive.

I have no idea how to react in these situations (which happen daily, even when he just gets a glimpse of a male on the other side of the street). The quarantine situation doesn't help since he's been seeing a lot less dogs lately, but the problem had begun a while before that.

I'm feeling more and more desperate about it. Before having a dog, it was the joy of my day to see sexy dogs in the street/park. I thought having my own dog would finally give me a reason to go and interact with these dogs. Now instead I automatically get scared when I see one, and search for the fastest way out. It sucks. I already struggle with depression in general, and even if he brought joys in my life, I'd feel really bad if I couldn't enjoy the few I already had, especially if it comes to dogs.

All right, enough complaining about it... Do you guys have any advice to improve the situation? Neutering is out of question, obviously. I know he'll never be perfect with other males, he's that way and I need to accept it. But there must be ways to at least make him tolerate them a little more... right? What can I do, and how do I need to react in these situations?

Thank you for your help
 
wilderknot said:
he's been getting more and more "dominant" (by lack of a better word) and agressive towards the vast majority of other intact males.
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From what I understand this is quite normal for intact male dogs in their early years (whether you are engaging in sexual activities with them or not), but I'm more familiar and informed about female canines than males. Others may have more experienced comments/suggestions. My intact female - who is just now becoming mature (had her first heat) - does NOT like other female dogs, intact or not (no problem with males), and I have not had any sexual play or contact with her at all.
 
Congratulations - you own a completely normal adult male German Shepherd.

I'd say forget letting your dog play with other intact males.
It is actually totally unnatural to have a dog get along with every dog in existence. Dogs are territorial and German Shepherds carry this trait in an enhanced state.
The most important thing is to not be afraid as soon as you see another dog come by, because your GSD will notice it and therefore react more intense.
Do not pay attention to the other dogs at all and just go somewhere else with your dog.
I'd suggest you a trainer or look for "Upstate Canine Academy" on YouTube! He'll make your life a lot easier.
 
wilderknot said:
I have a 2yo german shepherd I adopted about a year ago. When I got him, he was basically perfect with every type of dog, he had been very well socialised and that's one of the main reasons why I picked him and not another dog. I knew he was still young and his personality would change a lot, but it looked like a very good base for a social and confident dog, which is what I was searching for.
Click to expand...
I had the same issue. My male was intact when adopted (scheduled the spaying and never showed up ahah). He was quiet and into his own businesses, after few moths he gained confidence and the aggressiveness started.

The key is not avoid the conflict let the dogs interact, they fear what they don't know/understand (so as we). The leach is the main problem, it is to be used for short periods for correction and not to pull. Used it like a cannon not like a rocket, quick and assertive/decisive pulls as a correction.

If he is too far gone, means you're late! In this case take his attention away at any means, fighting or punishing the dog is pointless. Tap him on the butt, usually works making them turn arround and then move away on a high pace. If there is a fav. toy or snack perfect, use it after he focus on you.

When manageable he needs to interact with mindful male dogs to learn that they aren't sea monsters. Dog parks with plenty of dogs letting him free is the best, surrounded by many only a mad dog will try to fight them all.
 
I don't really know what to add to the topic except that I understand you, @wilderknot. Around the time my dog turned two years old, he started to become dominant towards other males, also going into fights with unknown dogs when they wouldn't submit to him quickly. Harmony is important to me in real life and these quarrels made me feel really bad when I failed to prevent them. I wish you luck that you will be able to improve on it, maybe with help from others, but I guess we also need to accept some rivalry behavior to be part of a dog's nature.

You probably do already, but give your dog good exercise and tasks to solve, so he has other stuff than same-sex dogs to excite him and use his power. I don't mean to say that this will make his dominance go away, but doing nice stuff together is good for both of you and helps not to focus just on that one thing that bothers you.
 
wilderknot said:
Now instead I automatically get scared when I see one, and search for the fastest way out.
Click to expand...
Here might be the source of the problem, your dog seems to be protecting you. You get scared and run away, so he could be very likely associated those dogs as hazard for you and so goes on defend mode. If the case I have no good news.. you're the problem, and it's not easy fix. Your posture has to change and become the protector, you defend your dog from the world, not the other way around.
Don't let him lead the way, side by side, leach wobbly. You do nothing if other dog appears, no reaction, it's not a threat.. If the other dog be at your right, pass him to your left, you in between a just go by looking forwards. Correct any attempt to leave your side.
Unless you're a very good liar, faking your posture will not work, he will know. You really need to change from the inside
 
I'm afraid my English will not allow a normal answer. Briefly, this is adjusted. And not quite difficult.
It takes a long time to talk. Domestic dog is not only territorial, but also flock.
A leader =! dominant.
 
I agree - Its quite typical behaviour of the a male intact gsd. But it also might be that you are not in charge of your dog anymore.
 
First, you MUST learn to take this calmly, always. Your dog senses when you start to tense up, and when you tense up, your dog tends to react as if he were dealing with a serious threat.

If you can learn to take his aggression toward other intact dogs as a normal part of him being a healthy intact DOG, to take it in good humor, to act quickly to protect both dogs without panicking while you do so, to be confident about your ability to manage these types of situations, then you will stay relaxed in these situations, and that will eventually cut down on the drama.

It is normal and even healthy for your dog to have an urge to fight other intact male dogs. They usually don't seriously injure each other during this kind of dominance play, but it can be risky to let it continue because 1) accidents happen, and 2) you could instill an idea that this type of aggressive behavior is appropriate or acceptable, and that is not a good thing. It's not a bad thing that he wants to do it, but it is not a good thing if you fail to intervene. Trying to flex his muscles with other dogs is what your dog is supposed to do, and curbing him is what you are supposed to do.

Take the dominance behavior calmly, and use it as an opportunity to drill him on obedience. When you see another intact male dog coming by, tell him to sit at your side like a sentry, and give him a sense that he is doing something important to keep you safe. When the other dog goes by without incident, tell him that he is a very good dog for taking care of you, and thank him from the bottom of your heart for taking care of you. Make him believe that his job of sitting quietly like a sentry is the most important job any dog ever had. Make him feel like top brass. Make it a sort of roleplaying game, where he is a soldier dog and has to sit next to you as a quiet guard and to know the difference between real danger and ordinary business.

Eventually, as he gets older, you will no longer have to tell him, but that will be his default.
 
wilderknot said:
Hey,

I have a 2yo german shepherd I adopted about a year ago. When I got him, he was basically perfect with every type of dog, he had been very well socialised and that's one of the main reasons why I picked him and not another dog. I knew he was still young and his personality would change a lot, but it looked like a very good base for a social and confident dog, which is what I was searching for.

But these last few months, he's been getting more and more "dominant" (by lack of a better word) and agressive towards the vast majority of other intact males. He's absolutely perfect with female dogs, puppies, most neutered males and old intact males, he's very playful and social. But it looks like he has a "need" to feel like he's in charge when he sees other intact males. As long as they're not 100% submissive, he won't be happy and he'll be agressive.

I have no idea how to react in these situations (which happen daily, even when he just gets a glimpse of a male on the other side of the street). The quarantine situation doesn't help since he's been seeing a lot less dogs lately, but the problem had begun a while before that.

I'm feeling more and more desperate about it. Before having a dog, it was the joy of my day to see sexy dogs in the street/park. I thought having my own dog would finally give me a reason to go and interact with these dogs. Now instead I automatically get scared when I see one, and search for the fastest way out. It sucks. I already struggle with depression in general, and even if he brought joys in my life, I'd feel really bad if I couldn't enjoy the few I already had, especially if it comes to dogs.

All right, enough complaining about it... Do you guys have any advice to improve the situation? Neutering is out of question, obviously. I know he'll never be perfect with other males, he's that way and I need to accept it. But there must be ways to at least make him tolerate them a little more... right? What can I do, and how do I need to react in these situations?

Thank you for your help
Click to expand...
You might try to locate a trainer with a background in reactive dogs. While it doesn't seem that your dog is reactive, he is showing many of the same temperment issues that many reactive dogs have. Those trainers, having the specialized background that they have, could be a huge boon for you.
 
I will agree with most said here and I admit a difficulty with German shepards I have 25 stitches in my head from when I was 5 from my grandfathers German Shepard. No I didn’t do anything to him and he ended up being put down for attacking my brother in front of everyone. I know it was a puppy mill dog and Shepards are good dogs. If you got him at a year old and hadn’t socialized him part of the fault is yours, still male dogs do set their pecking order. YOU may have to establish yourself as the dominate in order to overcome his behavior. Should you not be able to accomplish that you might be better served to get his exercise at hours that present the least offers of confrontation. One thing you can count on he has established that he will fight and if need be give his life to protect you. I realize that isn’t an answer you wanted to hear but instincts over generations are not easy to over come.
 
Hey all! Sorry for the delay, I just saw your responses and didn’t expect to have so many comprehensive advices.

So, a lot has happened since my first post. Quarantine has ended in my area and we’ve been able to meet plenty of other dogs daily for the last few weeks. As crazy and awesome as it sounds, I think the problem is fixed :)

He might have become scared of other male dogs since there was a period when we lived in the countryside and couldn’t see many. Since they’re the hardest type of dogs to interact with, he probably went for the agressivity because it made him feel safe and it was simplest reaction to him.

But by gradually meeting other males and interacting with them, he’s learned that they aren’t dangerous and everything is fine.
There is a male husky here who’s known to be very dominant and not always very nice with other males. The first time we met him (before the quarantine), they directly started to fight and it went pretty bad. But now we’ve seen him again a few times and they almost play together. It’s awesome, really. I couldn’t believe it the first time :)

It’s still a bit complicated sometimes when he’s leashed (even if I have become very confident about it), but I think he’ll end up being confident about it as well.

I have no idea if I’m incredibly lucky or if socialisation is just the way to go to fix these problems. Probably a bit of both, but I’m very thankful about it. I hope we’ll continue meeting plenty of lovely dogs and enjoy them together :)

Thanks a lot for your messages though, you all have very interesting point of views. I’ll be sure to apply your advices if the situation asks for them. Zoos are definitely a lot more helpful than normal people :)
 
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