Is ghosting/catfishibg really THAT bad on here?

I'm just wondering if maybe it's me? I'm presented with these amazing opportunities with seemingly intellectual, respectful, and emotionally mature local owners who also tend to claim to have at least once reference... but then when it starts to get "real" shit goes radio silent. Just like, tell me what part of this get you off if you think you're guilty of this? No judgements. I just want to understand the appeal you think folks have with more or less stringing women, maybe like me in particular, along? Am I naive? Am I blind to lust? Maybe I'm too eager or overbearing and that comes across as intense? Other red flags/social faux pas I just ain't seeing?

Idk, if you got a minute, gimme some insights on your experiences both ghosting and being ghosted?

Again I ask for a JUDGEMENTS FREE ZONE.
 
For me, pretty simple iff while chatting it looks like your telling your story to be true and it looks like fantasy or to good to be true I'm off, as a experienced zoo you easily know what's true or fantasy.

I don't mind fantasies at all but do tell it us your fantasy, do not try to make your fantasy a true story in a chat, i will ghost you fast, also your directly a fake who just wants to jerk off or trying to expose someone in my mind.
 
For me, pretty simple iff while chatting it looks like your telling your story to be true and it looks like fantasy or to good to be true I'm off, as a experienced zoo you easily know what's true or fantasy.

I don't mind fantasies at all but do tell it us your fantasy, do not try to make your fantasy a true story in a chat, i will ghost you fast, also your directly a fake who just wants to jerk off or trying to expose someone in my mind.
Yes! It just must be some fantasy fulfillment on their end? I just don't get the manipulative dark psychology behind like, doing that to vulnerable others as YOUR thing? I suppose it hurts because the person/s I would like to connect with need to have the qualities I described in my first post. I don't want total NSA, I want connection and friendship too. So I worked on that aspect while talking to them and I just feel like my emotional labor was misused. And now my morale is nearly gone and I obviously need to find a middle ground between reserved and safe while showing enough vulnerability to been seen hopefully as authentic and safe to them.

I have a reference on here that would be happy to share our meeting experiences, I have verification photos. If any owners in SWPA see this, my DMs are stupidly still open.
 
I get ghosted a lot as well, I'm still not entirely sure why. I think it gets too real for certain people at some point and they panic/abort.
You AFAB for male dog? I would think most of the ghosting happens with women stringing along owners before reaching a point that they tell themselves they can't actually go through with meeting or any acts. Just surprised owners ghost so regularly? Idfk, I've had this fetish since adolescence, I'm 35 and just now joined the forum to meet like minded people, so VERY new to the zoo *community*

I am experienced, it can happen, just stay safe and smart, I wish you all the luck!
 
You AFAB for male dog? I would think most of the ghosting happens with women stringing along owners before reaching a point that they tell themselves they can't actually go through with meeting or any acts. Just surprised owners ghost so regularly? Idfk, I've had this fetish since adolescence, I'm 35 and just now joined the forum to meet like minded people, so VERY new to the zoo *community*

I am experienced, it can happen, just stay safe and smart, I wish you all the luck!
I've messaged over a dozen people stating that I'm looking for an owner for my friend, and all of them have eventually ghosted. Maybe they dislike that they're talking to me instead of her, but for obvious reasons she doesn't want to be anywhere near the site lol
 
I've messaged over a dozen people stating that I'm looking for an owner for my friend, and all of them have eventually ghosted. Maybe they dislike that they're talking to me instead of her, but for obvious reasons she doesn't want to be anywhere near the site lol
No, they probably dislike that you're viewing them as nothing but a John for their dog, and that you only want to talk to them to set up a "play date". Surprise, surprise, we're humans, complex beings, sex is far from the only thing in life, and if that's all you want to talk about then... goodbye.
 
I've messaged over a dozen people stating that I'm looking for an owner for my friend, and all of them have eventually ghosted. Maybe they dislike that they're talking to me instead of her, but for obvious reasons she doesn't want to be anywhere near the site lol
Which reasons do you mean? The most obvious reason I can think of is that a woman doesn't want to have to do anything with all of this. Then it would of course be good that owners don't get involved in whatever you are trying to set up with them.
 
Usually these things fall into 3 categories:

1) the person is fake in some regard. Either they’re not really a woman, don’t actually own an animal or they may be someone looking to bust / out a zoo member. So the longer the conversation goes on the harder it is to hide that. Or it gets to a point where the lie is impossible to keep up - such as getting to a point where meeting is planned.

2. The person isn’t 100% committed. Maybe it’s a fun idea, a fetish they’re exploring, or something they’ve obsessed about for years. But once things get real and it’s at a point where it looks like it will happen, they get cold feet. It’s easy to talk endlessly about it on line, but it’s quite terrifying and requires a huge commitment and lots of trust to actually go through with meeting someone in real life. So getting cold feet is normal.

3. They changed their mind about you for some reason. Maybe you came on too strong, to desperate or maybe they just decided that personalities don’t click quite how they want. Hell, even just a simple misunderstanding can cause it. This is virtual interactions and misunderstandings are very easy to occur. But the point is, you’re working hard to develop a level of trust with the person you’re communicating with and it’s wholly possible that something turned them off to you.

Unfortunately our virtual world often means people don’t feel the need to actually tell you they’re no longer interested. Let alone why. It’s so easy to just disappear and block. It’s unfortunate, but it’s a reality of virtual interactions and it’s kinda a normative behavior in general now.

So, if you’re committed just stick with it and know that you’ll likely run into this a bit. But it’s also worthwhile to reflect and think critically about whether you possibly are part of the problem as in reason 3. Good luck though and hopefully you’ll find someone you connect with.
 
It doesn’t take but a moment to know if someone is real or quoting fantasy stories. My life experiences are mine alone and I am not here to educate every troll that appears.
I get to many messages requesting descriptions from f my experiences. Those get deleted and I just move on.
 
No, they probably dislike that you're viewing them as nothing but a John for their dog, and that you only want to talk to them to set up a "play date". Surprise, surprise, we're humans, complex beings, sex is far from the only thing in life, and if that's all you want to talk about then... goodbye.
Get off the cross we need the wood, you don't know me or how I engage this. I straight up tell people I want to get to know them first and that nothing would be happening until everyone including the dog is comfortable. Maybe that's what off-putting to them as the owners
 
Which reasons do you mean? The most obvious reason I can think of is that a woman doesn't want to have to do anything with all of this. Then it would of course be good that owners don't get involved in whatever you are trying to set up with them.
The way a lot of women on here are harassed by the dudes that act like piranhas with blood in the water as soon as a feminine presence is found
 
Um. Just checked your basics.

You have been here less than a month, 27 posts and most of them were not here until you opened this thread, so I'd be cateful when interacting with you.

Of your messages, most are likes and kudos, only two or three look to be insightful about you.
In your intro you declare 30 on a post 34 in another -edit delete this one, you said 30s :)

... female and willing to do things. Now, here you state is for a female friend. If that was disclosed in the PM I would find it a red flag.
 
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Um. Just checked your basics.

You have been here less than a month, 27 posts and most of them were not here until you opened this thread, so I'd be cateful when interacting with you.

Of your messages, most are likes and kudos, only two or three look to be insightful about you.
In your intro you declare 30 on a post 34 in another -edit delete this one, you said 30s :)

... female and willing to do things. Now, here you state is for a female friend. If that was disclosed in the PM I would find it a red flag.
I'm not sure where you think I stated something was for a female friend? And I have been pretty consistent on here when I have time, i am just still also new to the forums. However I certainly seem to offer more insight into who I am than 99.9% of the people who've reached out to me. I appreciate you're playing the devils advocate but I don't think those are super valid or any huge red flags?
 
I'm not sure where you think I stated something was for a female friend? And I have been pretty consistent on here when I have time, i am just still also new to the forums. However I certainly seem to offer more insight into who I am than 99.9% of the people who've reached out to me. I appreciate you're playing the devils advocate but I don't think those are super valid or any huge red flags?
You are right. I misread message #6 as being yours. Sorry, I skimmed too fast.

In any case, just playing to try give you clues. I am not the goshting type, I am not one to meet strangers for sex. So any of these signs are not big red flags to me, but I sure would be cautious and take things slowly.

Personally I tend to look both the registering and also post history, specially those posts taking a position or an opinion that can show their train of thought.

One thing is true. We are all hair triggered here because of the possible consequences. Owners, or you should be cateful too. One minor error or missunderstanding can scare away someone promising.

I've sern people calling from Germany and two or three USA states. It may easily be someone working for an international contract company, but unless explained first suspicious is it might be a bait
 
I'm just wondering if maybe it's me? I'm presented with these amazing opportunities with seemingly intellectual, respectful, and emotionally mature local owners who also tend to claim to have at least once reference... but then when it starts to get "real" shit goes radio silent. Just like, tell me what part of this get you off if you think you're guilty of this? No judgements. I just want to understand the appeal you think folks have with more or less stringing women, maybe like me in particular, along? Am I naive? Am I blind to lust? Maybe I'm too eager or overbearing and that comes across as intense? Other red flags/social faux pas I just ain't seeing?

Idk, if you got a minute, gimme some insights on your experiences both ghosting and being ghosted?

Again I ask for a JUDGEMENTS FREE ZONE.
I have no idea but I’ve been experiencing similar stuff, kinda figured this place would be different
 
It most certainly is friend. Sooo many fake people, people who tell stories for personal gratification etc. Stolen pics... U name it. Very few 'real' people. My experience anyway. I mean I wasn't expecting anything more but yeah. Bit sad.
 
I think many people left their common sense somewhere before coming here. There is so. much nonsense that I rarely comment on it, not wanting to get into spats, and thinking it's obvious to one and all. Though I do get the fact that to many this is the only avenue to explore this side of themselves - perhaps they can take an element of fantasy further than they intended.
 
Get off the cross we need the wood, you don't know me or how I engage this. I straight up tell people I want to get to know them first and that nothing would be happening until everyone including the dog is comfortable. Maybe that's what off-putting to them as the owners
It doesn't matter what you tell anyone about your plans or intentions. All that stuff about getting to know everyone and all that shit......doesn't matter. It would hold some water between 2 people because that's really how it has to work.

The part where the logic breaks down is the 3rd person. I don't doubt you've had conversations here, but I do doubt how serious those conversations were. Not your part of the serious, but the other end. I can almost guarantee you that whatever owner was involved reached an almost instant decision as soon as the words "I have a friend" appeared in your message. They might or might not decide to go along and see what they see from that point, but the decision is almost certainly made at that point, against.

This isn't a team sport. People might add others in later (very unlikely), but to start, it's 2 or it's zero. The way most people go about things, it's hard enough with 2 people, 3 is an instant thanks, but no thanks. Not only is that 3rd person irrelevant to the equation, it's an extra unwanted, unneeded risk that serves no other purpose except to add another layer of risk.

I get DMs weekly from the "on behalf of" crowd. Even when you take out the red flags these DMs immediately present, the risk to me that this 3rd person brings makes this an immediate nope.

This is secret shit, and it should stay secret. 2 can keep a secret if the 2nd person is equally guilty. Person number 3 here is an outlier that no rational owner is going to take on.
 
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