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Hiding My Kink from My Husband/He Guessed It

hellsbells

hellsbells

Tourist
Okay so a few weeks ago, my husband and I were drunkingly going at it and in his drunken delirium asked me what my biggest fantasy was. I, also being drunk, couldnt really formulate answer while being pounded from behind. I just kept saying "I don't know, I can't really think right now".

He suddenly said "I bet I know what it is. You'd let an animal fuck you, wouldn't you?".

I literally was so surprised that he guess it but had to continue to feign ignorance. We had watched cartoon and AI beast porn together once and I feigned apathy on my part, and a few years ago (after having a beer or two) I had confessed at watching human/animal "once" before pretending like finding it was an accident. But never would I have thought he'd been able to so blantantly call me out like that before.

We haven't spoken of it since then. I don't know how to bring it up. I don't even know if he remembers it or not.

I would love to confess my real kinks but I'm afraid he'll either push me away or pressure me into actually doing something. Either ends of the spectrum... I'm scared of both.

And note, while watching human/animal porn is very erotic to me, I honestly can't imagine doing it something with an animal myself.

If it helps, my husband is also a self proclaimed hedonist.
 
Does it seem like your husband could be testing the waters because he's thinking about coming out himself?
If he's expressed hedonistic, or otherwise open minded perspectives before it could be that he's not opposed to the idea of zoophilia. Maybe he's even a zoo himself! He seems to have brought it up a few times independently by now.

Planning for a worst case, could you cope with him not accepting you? What could that look like? Can you be independently stable (financially, emotionally)?
And vica versa, do you feel confident asserting your boundaries when it comes to feeling pressured into sex you aren't ready for just yet?
 
If he didn't accept me, that would be okay. If he wanted to stay with me, then great! But if he didn't... I'd be heartbroken but would eventually be okay and financially I can support myself.

I love him and don't want to lose him.

On the flip side, if we confess and he gets th inkling that it's something we could try... I know him and if he REALLY wants, he will try to wittle away at the boundary until I give in.

I feel confident I could say "no I am serious this time" and not budge.

I hate being so flip-floppy.
 
I was very nervous about telling one of my close female friends out of fear of being judged and rejected. Her reaction was positive and accepting. She said I made her feel kinda special for trusting her enough to even share something so personal with her. And she was actually down for watching any clips or links that I asked her if she would watch. She was turned on by it but drew a line at sleeping with a pup. Later on, not too long ago, she asked me one night to send her more clips to get off too. And she told me she would consider allowing a dog to lick her as long as it wasnt her own dog. So youd be surprised what someone close to you is really open to trying. You just have to set boundaries and dont let anyone push you into something you yourself arent entirely sure about yet. Sounds like your husband is testing the waters and might be waiting for the subject to be brought up again. Especially since the way he caught you off guard that night when he said that. You just have to think on it more and then decide how to approach the situation if you want to go through with it.
 
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