Fists of Furry
Tourist
I saw a sex therapist recently to discuss my sexuality and she told me that Zoophilia is far more common than most would have us believe. I didn't need that affirmation. I am okay with being a rarity. Still, knowing that far more people are into Zoophilia than we are being told, gave me a devious grin. I can't stand the post-Puritanical judgey bullshit that society throws at us and feel most alive around sex positive people. Knowing that many people are just in hiding made me feel vindicated.
That said, I looked to Grindr to see just how many people I could find to bark up that proverbial zoo tree with me. I set my profile picture to a dog, made my title "Zoo" and wrote as a caption: I love animals, literally. Folks, the men came to me. I didn't message a single person. I figure it was about 1 in 10 that either expressed a curiosity or sincere desire to engage or watch me engage in intercourse with my pet.
Soon, I got over confident and started reaching out to people. I knew I was bound to get lack luster results but it was fun. Especially the conversation starters. First, I started off small:
"Hey, me and my dog are watching a movie tonight and we're both feeling horny. Want to come over?"
"Hey, is that dog in your profile picture yours? Yes? He's really handsome, definitely my type."
Then came the answers:
"ummmm"
"lol"
"what do you mean your type"
"ew! get therapy you sick fuck"
That last one always stung a bit, not because I feel I'm sick, but because it's disappointing to see people react that way.
I started to ease the questions in more gradually. A guy sends me a picture of his ass: "That's really hot. Hey, you know, my dog sometimes gets rowdy at night. He might jump on the bed while we're having sex. Would that bother you?" Or I might try to be funny: "Hey, my dog might want in on the action. Can I share you with him?"
I'm telling you, at least 1 in 10 are not strictly opposed to this. When I get really into the mood, I sometimes take it too far. For example, I like rimming dogs so I went to Google to find a high resolution image of a frontal view of a dog's ass, tail raised and everything. I began indiscriminately sending it to people with the caption "Interested?" Responses ranged from "WTF" to nothing at all.
Then came the bans. I'll never know if it was a particular conversation that got me reported or if it was some AI algorithm. Was it someone that was feigning interest only to report me later? Or was it the person that said I needed therapy. In order to appeal your ban on Grindr you have to file a formal request. If you do that, it will get reviewed, along with your account information. To me, I'd rather accept a ban than have my information scrutinized, especially because there is a clause in the terms and conditions that gives them the right to report you to authorities.
Anyway, it has brought me joy throwing my sexuality out there and seeing it accepted by so many. It's also humored me to get the various reactions. Being banned, however, is unfortunate. Going through the steps to create a new email is just not something I want to do too many times. Additionally, each banned account is connected to the same phone number, so perhaps I should be done.
Cheers to my fellow Zoophiles
That said, I looked to Grindr to see just how many people I could find to bark up that proverbial zoo tree with me. I set my profile picture to a dog, made my title "Zoo" and wrote as a caption: I love animals, literally. Folks, the men came to me. I didn't message a single person. I figure it was about 1 in 10 that either expressed a curiosity or sincere desire to engage or watch me engage in intercourse with my pet.
Soon, I got over confident and started reaching out to people. I knew I was bound to get lack luster results but it was fun. Especially the conversation starters. First, I started off small:
"Hey, me and my dog are watching a movie tonight and we're both feeling horny. Want to come over?"
"Hey, is that dog in your profile picture yours? Yes? He's really handsome, definitely my type."
Then came the answers:
"ummmm"
"lol"
"what do you mean your type"
"ew! get therapy you sick fuck"
That last one always stung a bit, not because I feel I'm sick, but because it's disappointing to see people react that way.
I started to ease the questions in more gradually. A guy sends me a picture of his ass: "That's really hot. Hey, you know, my dog sometimes gets rowdy at night. He might jump on the bed while we're having sex. Would that bother you?" Or I might try to be funny: "Hey, my dog might want in on the action. Can I share you with him?"
I'm telling you, at least 1 in 10 are not strictly opposed to this. When I get really into the mood, I sometimes take it too far. For example, I like rimming dogs so I went to Google to find a high resolution image of a frontal view of a dog's ass, tail raised and everything. I began indiscriminately sending it to people with the caption "Interested?" Responses ranged from "WTF" to nothing at all.
Then came the bans. I'll never know if it was a particular conversation that got me reported or if it was some AI algorithm. Was it someone that was feigning interest only to report me later? Or was it the person that said I needed therapy. In order to appeal your ban on Grindr you have to file a formal request. If you do that, it will get reviewed, along with your account information. To me, I'd rather accept a ban than have my information scrutinized, especially because there is a clause in the terms and conditions that gives them the right to report you to authorities.
Anyway, it has brought me joy throwing my sexuality out there and seeing it accepted by so many. It's also humored me to get the various reactions. Being banned, however, is unfortunate. Going through the steps to create a new email is just not something I want to do too many times. Additionally, each banned account is connected to the same phone number, so perhaps I should be done.
Cheers to my fellow Zoophiles
