So confused and ashamed for something i can't help thinking

T

Thepeeny

Lurker
Hey, I'm a lurker here. I come back every now and then to have a read or a watch but i don't consider myself a zoophile, because I'm in denial essentially.

By all accounts i am. I haven't had actual sexual intercourse with an animal but i have had experiences that i would define as sexual.

But every time after engaging in an act or watching porn involving animals i feel a huge amount of shame and tell myself it will never happen again. This has been going on for years. Like 5 years on and off.

My my most recent activity was last week when i was at my sisters. I let her collie lick my penis and i finished and i did feel ashamed but after a few minutes i got the urge to finger her. I was very gentle only using one finger and going slow but she let out a little yelp and i felt horrible, she was okay though she wasn't hurt. She's 1yo and not currently in heat so idk if i was doing wrong as I'm not very educated in it.

I guess i just wanted to talk to someone that's maybe been going through, or has been through similar? i just want to be sure of who i am and if that means accepting i am a zoophile then so be it
 
I have no experience with sexual activities so I can’t help you there. But I can empathize with the shame. It’s hard not to believe you’re bad when everyone is constantly telling you touching animals is evil. it’s considered even worse if you like female animals.

I only accepted being a zoophile this year even thought I knew about it for years… and I’ll be honest, I still feel ashamed after watching porn.

It gets easier though I think, at least here you’ll have people who understand and have lived a zoo life. There are guides on how to safely engage with animals in the how to section, though most people here (myself included) don’t recommend messing with other peoples animals
 
temporaryacc said:
I have no experience with sexual activities so I can’t help you there. But I can empathize with the shame. It’s hard not to believe you’re bad when everyone is constantly telling you touching animals is evil. it’s considered even worse if you like female animals.

I only accepted being a zoophile this year even thought I knew about it for years… and I’ll be honest, I still feel ashamed after watching porn.

It gets easier though I think, at least here you’ll have people who understand and have lived a zoo life. There are guides on how to safely engage with animals in the how to section, though most people here (myself included) don’t recommend messing with other peoples animals
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Thanks for the reply, glad I'm not the only one i guess. outside of this site the online chatter about zoophiles is so aggressively negative that it hurts. I can totally see why engaging with others animals wouldn't be advised as well.
 
This is a very common feeling. Many people go through this because you are conditioned to be against zoophilia from pretty much the beginning.
My usual advice is to deconstruct your own mind and understand what is making you feel like this. Write it down if you want, it helps when you can read it again and elaborate on the ideas. Eventually you should realize that there is no point fighting it and accept it.
 
Try to talk to other zoos! :) I am available to DM to talk to, once you obtain access to that on your account (10 forum posts), but a lot of people like myself have definitely had similar experiences of shame and confusion.

There's nothing you can do about the things you feel, and there's nothing wrong with it either. It sounds like you care very much about not hurting animals, it's a great bearing to have in general :)
 
1. You really shouldn't mess with other people animals
2. At 1 year old she is still trying to figure things out and ya startled her
3. If you're going to go against better judgment wait a few more heat cycles and play with her a bit before going straight into the sexual stuff
4. make sure she flags
 
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I felt the same way. . .talking to others is a great way of gaining perspective. if you're harming anyone or an animal then it's ok, love and accept yourself. you're not alone:)
 
I can totally relate to the feelings you have. As for me, I was brought up that sex is only for people that are married and then only to have children. It was very evident that it was dirty and that you should never even have thoughts about it. Obviously this is totally not only untrue but unhealthy as well. We are all sexual being, no one should ever be told or taught that sex is dirty as well as we all are different and the same thing that is sexually exciting to one may not be to another one.

I had a very hard time accepting and loving my true inner self because of my up bringing and the fact this was a long time before the internet so educating myself was next to impossible.
 
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