I love it and hate it

My interest in animals is distressing me a lot. I've been letting the family dog lick my cock and asshole and she likes it, especially if I use peanut butter. Anyway, I only let her lick me when my family isn't home, which is semi-occasional. I get really excited when I hear I'm going to be home alone, but it also causes me anxiety. I don't want to embrace zoophilia unless I'm safe to do it by myself, comfortably in my own place. I feel disgusted with myself afterwards and ashamed, paranoid if the neighbors saw or if I left something incriminating out. I want it all or not at all, you know? But it feels so good and I eventually cave and feel disgusted with myself all over. What if my family found out? Or even caught me? Are the feds watching?

Sorry for the rant, I just am worried I'm going over the deep end in quarantine sometimes.

I imagine I'm not alone out there.
 
My interest in animals is distressing me a lot. I've been letting the family dog lick my cock and asshole and she likes it, especially if I use peanut butter. Anyway, I only let her lick me when my family isn't home, which is semi-occasional. I get really excited when I hear I'm going to be home alone, but it also causes me anxiety. I don't want to embrace zoophilia unless I'm safe to do it by myself, comfortably in my own place. I feel disgusted with myself afterwards and ashamed, paranoid if the neighbors saw or if I left something incriminating out. I want it all or not at all, you know? But it feels so good and I eventually cave and feel disgusted with myself all over. What if my family found out? Or even caught me? Are the feds watching?

Sorry for the rant, I just am worried I'm going over the deep end in quarantine sometimes.

I imagine I'm not alone out there.

*sigh* next time, when you are alone with the pup, do NOT forgot to wear the tin foil!!
 
It gets less frustrating. You won’t feel ashamed anymore. You will want to share your experiences with other likeminded people. You will be sure to get a pet friendly place once you move out.

dont sweat it!
 
It gets less frustrating. You won’t feel ashamed anymore. You will want to share your experiences with other likeminded people. You will be sure to get a pet friendly place once you move out.

dont sweat it!
Thank you. I just worry when my need to get my knob polished interferes with my life.

Society views what we do as wrong, but it feels right, then I second guess myself.
 
Thank you. I just worry when my need to get my knob polished interferes with my life.

Society views what we do as wrong, but it feels right, then I second guess myself.

More people engage in this lifestyle than you think. To me there's nothing wrong with it, it's a natural lifestyle that's been around as long as humanity itself.
 
My interest in animals is distressing me a lot. I've been letting the family dog lick my cock and asshole and she likes it, especially if I use peanut butter. Anyway, I only let her lick me when my family isn't home, which is semi-occasional. I get really excited when I hear I'm going to be home alone, but it also causes me anxiety. I don't want to embrace zoophilia unless I'm safe to do it by myself, comfortably in my own place. I feel disgusted with myself afterwards and ashamed, paranoid if the neighbors saw or if I left something incriminating out. I want it all or not at all, you know? But it feels so good and I eventually cave and feel disgusted with myself all over. What if my family found out? Or even caught me? Are the feds watching?

Sorry for the rant, I just am worried I'm going over the deep end in quarantine sometimes.

I imagine I'm not alone out there.
There is nothing inherently wrong with what you are doing. None. Believe that, and learn to stand up for that.

Late persecution against zoophiles has only galvanized us into becoming more organized, and we are starting to develop a leadership structure.

In the past, we have not thought about the lack of social acceptance because we were a lot less alone. With all of the witch-hunts against LGBT and against marijuana smokers and against women getting abortions and unmarried couples and polyamorists and other social scapegoats and made-up devils, the police and bigotry-motivated legislators and phony moral crusaders just rarely got around to us. In a world of shadows, we just hid behind other shadows. The biggest difference now is that we have fewer shadows to hide behind.

It is like being gay in Saudi Arabia. It is easier to be gay than it is to be straight, there. The morality police there are so busy chasing after every single unmarried couple and every single exposed female ankle, they just have no time left in their day. In Russia, on the other hand, gay people are being singled out in an otherwise permissive society, and it has gotten dangerous for them.

At this point, it is imperative to avoid getting into prolonged arguments with predatory bigots. The more time you waste on them, the less time you have for talking openly and honestly with better quality people. Also, the more angry words you throw at bigots, the more you feed their paranoid delusions, so all it does is escalate. Raging at bigots is the most self-defeating thing we ever do, no exceptions.

Find people who cause you to act like a good person. Use this as a litmus test for whether or not you really ought to continue being in someone's acquaintance. Other people in your life deserve to see the best person you can be. You owe it to them, and you owe it to yourself. I guess that anybody could use this advice, but last time I checked, "anybody" includes zoos.

However, let me give you a tip on how to get over feeling disgusted: let yourself perceive that all sex is disgusting. All of it. The sex your mom and dad were having when they conceived you was disgusting. Any sex you have is going to be disgusting. It is all disgusting. Therefore, you may be disgusting, but you are not alone in it. It sounds crazy, but I really think this would make you feel better.
 
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It seems like a lot of what you're caught up in is how others would perceive your actions if you were caught.

Sometimes it's useful to look to others or to society for approval, and sometimes it just isn't. In the end, it's a shortcut. Sometimes useful, sometimes not so useful. It doesn't require any thought to do what everyone thinks is acceptable. The downside is that if you don't fit into the mold, you may become filled with self hate and doubt. You'll spend your days wondering why you can't just be like everyone else.

You have the ability to reflect and come to your own conclusions on what you should do. Speaking from experience, it's really a great freeing feeling when you take this to heart. I've spent much of my life weighing the opinions of others over my own, and that has only led to self esteem issues and self hate.

In this case, why do you feel disgusted? Do you think the act itself is disgusting? Do you think others would feel disgusted if they caught you? Is it ok to feel disgusted by something and still do it?

You also mention feeling ashamed. What part of what you're doing brings about shame? Do you feel like what you're doing is alright? Does it cause harm? Does the dog enjoy it? Are you affecting the dog in a way that affects what it was trained to do (for example, it's probably not a good idea to teach a therapy dog that fucking people is ok)?

Asking questions like these about the beings involved can suss out how you really feel about what you're doing, regardless of what others think. If you conclude that what you're doing is ok (and in my biased opinion, what you're doing is perfectly fine), then you can go forward in secrecy and enjoy the company of your dog. If you determine that you should stop, you'll certainly have a clearer reason to do so than society saying you shouldn't. And that clear reason will probably be enough motivation to stop.
 
Oh, one more thing. When I was in your situation, I was told something that I've found useful: Everyone has different relationships with animals. Some people like to pet them, others like to take them for runs, others use them for a trained task, and others like getting fucked by them. How you interact with the animal is between you and them, and as long as you're both alright with what's going on, it seems fine. They aren't objects to be controlled by their owners - they're living beings and they have preferences, desires, and relationships with other beings.
 
It seems like a lot of what you're caught up in is how others would perceive your actions if you were caught.

Sometimes it's useful to look to others or to society for approval, and sometimes it just isn't. In the end, it's a shortcut. Sometimes useful, sometimes not so useful. It doesn't require any thought to do what everyone thinks is acceptable. The downside is that if you don't fit into the mold, you may become filled with self hate and doubt. You'll spend your days wondering why you can't just be like everyone else.

You have the ability to reflect and come to your own conclusions on what you should do. Speaking from experience, it's really a great freeing feeling when you take this to heart. I've spent much of my life weighing the opinions of others over my own, and that has only led to self esteem issues and self hate.

In this case, why do you feel disgusted? Do you think the act itself is disgusting? Do you think others would feel disgusted if they caught you? Is it ok to feel disgusted by something and still do it?

You also mention feeling ashamed. What part of what you're doing brings about shame? Do you feel like what you're doing is alright? Does it cause harm? Does the dog enjoy it? Are you affecting the dog in a way that affects what it was trained to do (for example, it's probably not a good idea to teach a therapy dog that fucking people is ok)?

Asking questions like these about the beings involved can suss out how you really feel about what you're doing, regardless of what others think. If you conclude that what you're doing is ok (and in my biased opinion, what you're doing is perfectly fine), then you can go forward in secrecy and enjoy the company of your dog. If you determine that you should stop, you'll certainly have a clearer reason to do so than society saying you shouldn't. And that clear reason will probably be enough motivation to stop.

It's a lot to take in, but I think I get the gist of what your saying. I think I'm mainly afraid others would feel disgusted by me if they caught me. I suspect my mom likes dogs too for a few reasons, but how could I ever be sure, you know?
 
Yeah, I understand, and have similar concerns in my life. As far as the risks and consequences go, I'd ask myself what the best, average, and worst outcomes would be if you were to be caught, and how likely those are to happen. As well as considering the consequences for the dog. Doing that may give you a more realistic (rather than fear-based) idea of what's at stake. How much risk you want to take is a personal decision.
 
Others have given you very good supportive thoughts, so I guess it won't crush you, if I add a critical thought to these.

Apparently your dog likes peanut butter a lot—who doesn't?—and there is nothing wrong about giving your dog a treat that she loves. Due to using it to motivate her to do something that you like sexually, the sexual play isn't really mutual though. I mean it's nice for you both, but for different reasons. You are there for the sexual stimulation and she is there for the peanut butter that is not really supposed to be where you put it. Maybe your dog would also like to lick you without the peanut butter, but can you really know?

I don't mean to tell you that what you do would be morally wrong—or right either—but maybe that is one reason why you feel ashamed. By using peanut butter you kind of bribe her to do it and that may be harder to come to terms with than if she would be doing it for its own sake.
 
Others have given you very good supportive thoughts, so I guess it won't crush you, if I add a critical thought to these.

Apparently your dog likes peanut butter a lot—who doesn't?—and there is nothing wrong about giving your dog a treat that she loves. Due to using it to motivate her to do something that you like sexually, the sexual play isn't really mutual though. I mean it's nice for you both, but for different reasons. You are there for the sexual stimulation and she is there for the peanut butter that is not really supposed to be where you put it. Maybe your dog would also like to lick you without the peanut butter, but can you really know?

I don't mean to tell you that what you do would be morally wrong—or right either—but maybe that is one reason why you feel ashamed. By using peanut butter you kind of bribe her to do it and that may be harder to come to terms with than if she would be doing it for its own sake.

She goes searching in my pants when I have a hard on, I can just more easily focus her on a certain part of my body when I add peanut butter.
 
It's a lot to take in, but I think I get the gist of what your saying. I think I'm mainly afraid others would feel disgusted by me if they caught me. I suspect my mom likes dogs too for a few reasons, but how could I ever be sure, you know?
What makes you think your mother likes dogs more than the average people?
I would not recommend talking to your mom about that, whatever her sexual orientation for dogs will be. If she is attracted by dogs, i think it is a well kept secret for her. So she will not think about talking about it with you. Perhaps some words that are not too suspicious but may bring thoughts to start. "You look at the dog like a lover, and yes, she (or he) is worth such looks." Or something comparable...
 
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